Order of Merit 2012

Order of Merit - As at

No	Player	Pts
1	Lee Hyland	17
2	Ron Tuckey	17
3	Tony Randall	17
4	Nigel Wadey	15
5	Garry Johnson	13
6	Billy Hodges	12
7	Les Davey	11
8	Dan Bygrave	11
9	Tony Mason	10
10	Rob Ouzman	10
11	J Spriggs	10
12	John Ouzman	10
13	John Beeden	9
14	Steve McKeown	9
15	Daren Johnson	8
16	Louis Lovell	8
17	D Blowers	7
18	Steve Cragg	7
19	Tony Oliver Snr	7
20	John Leech	6
21	Lou O'Grady	6
22	Chris Blowers	5
23	Perry Butler	5
24	Paul Bygrave	5
25	Tony Starr	4
26	Alan Rhodes	4
27	Bruce Maguire	3
28	George Booker	3
29	Dara O'Carrol	3
30	Terry Johnson	2

 

 

How it works:

If you win a qualifying competiton you are awarded 11 points. The next best 10 scores in each division are awarded points as appropriate (10 down to 1).

2011 Matchplay Events

Micky Prosser International Pairs 2011

First pair drawn to make contact.

If match not played within time allocation, BOTH pairs are liable for disqualification.

Queries to Tony Freeman 07968521885 or Steve Cragg 02083104540

Please note that the pairs event is to be played off 3/4 handicap difference.

Rnd 1	Rnd 2	Qtr Final	Semi-Final	Final	Winners
By 01 May	By 26 June	By 14 Aug	By 18 Sept	On 9 Oct
	B Nelson & F Bagshaw v
	P Butler & L Vitali	P Butler & L Vitali
	D Bignall & G Townsend v	V	P Butler & L Vitali
	D Bigsby & P Coates	D Bignall & G Townsend	V
	L Watts & C Wallis v			P Butler & L Vitali
	T Starr & S Percival	L Watts & C Wallis
	A O'Grady & A Freeman v	V	A O'Grady & A Freeman
	S Moore & P Walsh	A O'Grady & A Freeman
	B Maguire & D O'Carroll v				B Maguire & D O'Carroll
	K Bygrave & D Bygrave	B Maguire & D O'Carroll v	B Maguire & D O'Carroll
	S Cragg & A Randall v	S Cragg & A Randall	V
	R Tuckey & D Flanagan			B Maguire & D O'Carroll
C Hartigan & G Hartigan v G Booker & P Knights	C Hartigan & G Hartigan	C Hartigan & G Hartigan	C Hartigan & G Hartigan
P Bygrave & P Elliot v A Oliver Snr & A Oliver Jnr	A Oliver Snr & A Oliver Jnr	V
J Ouzman & R Ouzman v D Johnson & J Beeden	J Ouzman & R Ouzman   v	J Ouzman & R Ouzman
J Truss & L Hyland v J Rolls & R Pound	J Rolls & R Pound

 

Kevin Mulvaney Matchplay Singles 2011

First player drawn to make contact.

If match not played within time allocation, BOTH players are liable for disqualification.

Queries to Tony Freeman 07968521885 or Steve Cragg 02083104540

Please note that the singles event is to be played off FULL handicap difference.

Rnd 1	Rnd 2	Quarter-Final	Semi-Final	Final
By 15 May	By 26 June	By 31 July	By 4 September	On 9 Oct

	Colin Hartigan V
	Gerry Hartigan	Gerry Hartigan
	Tony Starr   V	V	Sean Moore
	Sean Moore	Sean Moore
	Dara O'Carroll V		V
	Tony Freeman	Dara O'Carroll
	Steve Cragg V	V	Pat Brady
	Pat Brady	Pat Brady		Runner-up Pat Brady
	Rhys Pound V	Rhys Pound
	Ron Tuckey	V	Rhys Pound
	Paul Coates   V	John Ouzman
John Ouzman v Steve Percival	John Ouzman		V	Winner: Rhys Pound
Joe Rolls v Lee Vitali	Lee Vitali V	Lee Vitali
Daren Johnson v Bruce Maguire	Daren Johnson	V	Lee Vitali
Paul Bygrave v Tony Mason	Paul Bygrave V
Jim Truss v Derek Flanagan	Jim Truss

A Nun's Day Off

A nun walks into Mother Superior's office and slumps down in a chair; she lets out a sigh heavy with frustration.

"What troubles you, Sister?" asked the Mother Superior. "I thought this was the day you spent with your family."

"It is" sighed the Sister. "And I went to play golf with my brother. We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ."

"I recall that," the Mother Superior agreed. "So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?"

"Far from it", snorted the Sister. "In fact, I even took the Lord's name in vain today!"

"Goodness, Sister!" gasped the Mother superior, astonished. "You must tell me all about it!"

"Well, we were on the fifth tee.... and this hole is a monster, 540 par 5, with a nasty dogleg left and a hidden green. I hit the drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made. And it's flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted. Then it hit a bird in mid-flight not 100 yards off the tee, killing the bird and deflecting the ball badly!"

"Oh my!" commiserated the Mother. "How unfortunate! But surely that didn't make you blaspheme, Sister!"

"No, that wasn't it," admitted Sister. "While I was still trying to fathom what was happening, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway and starts digging a hole to put the ball in!"

"Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!" sympathised the Mother. "But I didn't, Mother!" sobbed the Sister. "While I was pondering whether this was a sign from God, a hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off with my ball still clutched in his paws!"

"So that's why you cursed," said the Mother with a knowing smile.

"Nope, that wasn't it either," cried the Sister, anguished, "because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel began struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green. The ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches of the cup!"

Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed the Sister with a baleful start and said, "You missed the f***ing putt, didn't you?"

 

A-Z of Golfing Vocabulary

Amuse your playing partners with one or two of these during your next round:

* An Adolf - two shots in a bunker

*An Anna Kournikova - looks great, but unlikely to get a result

* A Bin Laden - driven out and never to be found again

* A Cuban - needs one more revolution

* A Diego Maradonna / Dennis Wise - nasty five footer

* An Elton John - a big bender that lips the rim

* An Eva Braun - picked u in the bunker

* A Glen Miller - kept low and didn't make it over the water

* A gynaecologist's assistant - just shaves the hole

* A Jamie Oliver - you really want to smack it but you can't

* A Kate Winslett - a bit fat but otherwise perfect

* A Liberace - a fat iron

* An OJ Simpson - shouldn't have, but got away with it

* A Michael Jackson - fading away

* A Marylin Monroe - a fair crack up the middle [aka "A Blondie"]

* A Paris Hilton - very expensive hole

* A Princess Di - Shouldn't have taken a driver

* A Rock Hudson - thought it was straight, but it wasn't

* A Saddam Hussein - from one bunker straight into another

* A Sally Gunnell - ugly but a good runner

* A Salman Rushdie - an impossible read

* A son-in-law - not what you wanted but it'll do

* A Tony Blair - too much spin

* A Vinnie Jones - nasty kick when you're not expecting it

* A Yasser Arafat - ugly and in the sand